The topic of Aging Gracefully has interested me for the last twenty years or so. I have shared my experiences and reflections with others (lay people, religious, and priests) and grown in practical understanding. Given below are some important points:

1. GRATITUDE:
For everything, big or small, be grateful to God and to persons. Gradually, we realise that our life and, in fact, every moment is gifted. When we are grateful we will be happy. Let us always be grateful to those who help us, even if they are only doing their duty. This gratitude is not just an inner attitude but is expressed in word and deed.

2. LETTING GO OF THE PAST:
We can always be thankful for our positive experiences and learn from them. But we should not cling to them and lose our freedom. As for our negative experiences – like lack of forgiveness, regrets, and guilt – they often remain in us and surface periodically. With God’s grace we can let go of them fully and be free. Sometimes we do forgive, but the painful memory of the hurt or negative experience reminds us we need inner healing. Here again, the only way is to let go without brooding over the hurt or our wounded self.

3. LETTING GO OF THE FUTURE:
We can look forward to the future positively, i.e., with hope and patience, and plan for it (without living in our dream world). But often the future controls us – through fears and worries, greed and impatience. Most of our fears and worries are useless – they are rooted in our ego, and drain our energy. Similarly, greed and impatience are inordinate attachments that make us slaves. When I try to live, not in the past or future but in the present, my life becomes more peaceful, joyful, and fruitful.

4. ACCEPTANCE:
a) Accepting myself as I am: often because of earlier experiences, we do not accept ourselves easily. Our faith tells us that each one of us is fundamentally good. I am a child of God even though I have my sins and weaknesses. The Good News is that God loves and accepts me as I am. He loves me unconditionally (with my negatives) and challenges me to grow. He will never withdraw His love, and never reject me.

b) Accepting others as they are: others too have their positives and negatives, strengths and weaknesses. God loves each one of them just as He loves me. I am called to love and accept them though I may not agree with them or approve their behaviour or decisions.

c) Accepting the world as it is: the world is constantly changing. It is quite different today from what it was when we were younger. While we need not adopt the latest fashions, bemoaning the changes and/or being unhappy is no solution either.

5. RESPECT FOR ONE AND ALL:
When we accept the others as they are it is easier to respect them whatever their age, religion, nationality or social position. Each one is a precious human being to be respected. This respect should be seen not only our external behaviour but even our thoughts and judgments. Pope Francis reminds us of what we learnt as children: to be ever ready to say a sincere ‘Please’ or ‘Sorry’ or ‘Thank you’. Let us also remember the respect we owe to creation/nature, caring for it as our mother or sister, not destroying it or wasting its gifts.

6. PRAYER:
Often, as we grow older, our commitments outside decrease, and we have more time available for prayer. Besides liturgical and community prayer, and Lectio Divina (prayerful reading of Scripture), we can go deeper in personal prayer. Many move into a prayer of silence where, as Mother Teresa says: ‘I listen to Him and He listens to me” – in silence. Another help which deepens our faith is to remember that ‘God the Father, Son and Spirit dwell in me. I am His temple’ (I Cor. 3, 15; 6, 19; Cf. also I Jn.). An important prayer is the prayer of intercession. We usually pray for those we know, meet or serve. In a general way we also pray for the needs of the Church and of the world. We could now pray for specific national or international intentions with greater earnestness. There are people and countries suffering from natural or man-made calamities. Violence, persecution, discrimination, hunger, poverty, etc. are seen all around, and most of the victims are women and children.

7. A SENSE OF WONDER:
In today’s world people are busy rushing from one thing to another. They hardly have time to pause and wonder. Older people have many opportunities to deepen their sense of wonder and praise. Nature and creation around us are full of beauty, variety and uniqueness. We only need to stop and look in order to discover. Electronic media and technology provide us instant knowledge and communication; robots that are replacing humans, artificial intelligence, etc., show us the remarkable progress already made and make us wonder ‘What next?’. At the macro-cosmic level space-science and astronomy reveal to us marvels and mysteries that leave us gaping in awe and wonder. At the personal level we realise the wonder of our being (Ps 139), formed so intricately, developing so providentially, and reflecting the Creator’s presence so beautifully. These different aspects produce in us a sense of wonder, leading us more and more to find God in all things, and to praise and thank Him all the time.

Taking these suggestions and living them out helps us to make our aging years graceful and blessed – till the final call to share the fullness of life and love in God’s presence forever.