“Do I like a Jesuit? Or do I like the ‘Jesuits?’ Hmm, that’s a tough one… But is there a difference? Hmmm! I am not sure… Forget it. I have been associated with the Jesuits for 20 years… I have met many of them, and everyone of them has contributed to my growth. Some have died – God rest their souls! Many still are actively working for the people of God. A few, I hardly remember meeting them. And there are still others whom I haven’t met. But I still feel a unique familiarity with the Jesuits. Maybe I like the ‘Jesuits?’ Do I? Hmm, let’s see where this is going.
I grew up with the Jesuits around me. Each had their charm, but the collective effect was transforming. While growing up, prayer became a forced ritual. God was too abstract, and Jesus was far too holy and mighty to be reached. It wasn’t fun at all. However, praying with the Jesuits changed my perspective of God. That was when my pursuit to find the Cross I could embrace began.
The Jesuits I met growing up were prayerful and equanimous— not all, but most were. I think that was what I wished to become when I grew up— an equanimous person. Every time I saw a Jesuit pray in the chapel with his eyes fixed on the crucifix, wow, what a sight it was! That sight inspires more than all the ‘gyaan’ and the ‘preaching’ you freely give. And it’s easy to see the grace that flows through a praying Jesuit into everyone he meets and mentors. It’s transforming. I am a living example.
Prayer was not a ritual anymore. It was a tete-a-tete with my friend hanging on the cross. I became attuned to God’s word and His will. Even during COVID-19, when everything stopped and I felt hopeless, I could still hold on to my faith. I could still help my neighbor when I was struggling. That Jesuit retreat I took during the COVID, especially the exercises on contemplation, were so enriching that I found and embraced the Cross wholeheartedly. I would never have found a friend in Jesus if not for the Jesuits. I wouldn’t have become this Marlon who is interiorly free and equanimous today. I owe it to the praying Jesuits!
So, I think I am in love with the Jesuits— the Society of Jesus and the values it stands for! But it all happened through the individual Jesuits— the ones who prayed. Amazing, isn’t it?
I wish you guys remain ever ‘prayerful.’ And the world will be a better place. For we know where a praying Jesuit is, an alter Christus is born.”
I cannot but emphasize what Marlon has expressed. As Wittgenstein once wrote, “Whereof one cannot speak thereof, one must remain silent.” And I choose to pray in silence.
Mr. Marlon J. Noronha is a professional photographer. He has been associated with the Goa Jesuits since school.
Nithin Monteiro, SJ, (KAR) is currently pursuing his Ph.D Studies in Ethics & Artificial Intelligence at XIM University, Odisha. Contact: [email protected].
